Hello! Let me begin with a big thank you to every true friend in my past and present, thank you for being a part of my success story! This is my little love note to you all. Just imagine me singing passionately like the guy here.
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Now, let us move on to stabilizers. On the last post titled ‘Prayers of the Prey’, we did a little intro to biology where we got to bond a bit (I hope). This time, I thought we could grow that bond with a little chemistry. Here goes!
In industrial chemistry, a stabilizer is a chemical that is used to prevent degradation.
Simply say, it is a substance added to prevent unwanted change in the state of another substance. For example, heat and light stabilizers are added to plastics because they ensure safe processing and protect products against ageing and weathering (wiki). Don’t start yawning yet, stay with me!
Light stabilizers help your tires stay black, keep road cones from cracking in the hot sun and ensure plastic safety goggles stay clear instead of turning yellow over time. Without these important polymer additives, many everyday products would change colour, lose flexibility, become more prone to shattering and even undergo chemical transformations (SGS polymer solutions).
You will find stabilizers in aeronautics, textiles, economics, mathematics, psychology, sea vessels, food etcetera. They all define it differently. However, the general definition I could find is this, it is a device or substance, added to something to make it stable. That’s the little chemistry I know for now so let us move on.
Take a moment and look in the mirror, don’t be in a hurry, take a deep look beyond your physical attributes, who are you? Hold that thought as you read on.
I am a firm believer that people need people. This was not always my belief, it took time and growth (I am still growing) for me to see the truth in that sentence. There is nothing you venture into or try to achieve that will not involve people whether short or long term. I believe that refusing to network with people (the right ones) is the same as refusing to grow. There is something the mirror cannot show you but people will see it and call it out in seconds. It is not always about the bad sides, people can be the lens you need to see what you are good at, and what makes you stand out. People helped me realise my strengths in writing and speaking.
How do you relate with people? How do you express frustration and anger? Sometimes how we think we react isn’t exactly how it plays out. Some people even justify their harsh words with “it is not my fault he/she is too sensitive” or “I speak to other people like that and they don’t complain”. The mirror will not catch that but people will.
People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive disobedient, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than God. Have nothing to do with such people.1 Timothy 3 :1-5
Do you fit any of these descriptions?
My focus here is self-control; stabilizers. I believe the other attributes are the result of ‘underdoing’ or ‘overdoing’ things. We all agree that money is not evil right? Even the Bible says it is the love of money that is evil (1 Timothy 6:10). Excess. Just like eating is not bad until it becomes gluttony.
Ungrateful, choosing to only see what is not there rather than appreciating what is there. Here, something is not being done enough, ‘underdoing’. I could go on and on, just think about it. When someone acts in a way that any reasonable human would call wrong, it is usually because they did something too much, did it too little or did not do it at all. That is where self-control comes in, balance, moderation, stabilizers.
A city without a wall is open to so many attacks, you don’t want to be found anywhere near that city so why allow yourself to become the city; unguarded?
If you are struggling with lapses in self-control due to temptation, cravings and mistakes. It is okay to admit your struggles, it is okay to admit that you are not okay. Just don’t allow those struggles to keep you down. There is surely another way to satisfy that urge without giving in to it. (svb.com). It is not easy but we have to remind ourselves to pause, think and look for a way out of temptation. I don’t always have to respond to a rude comment, if I pause for just one second, it will make all the difference. I realise that the pause has saved me from so many troubles.
Is that last sentence necessary or will the information still be complete without it? Do you have to buy one more or is the one you have enough? Is it okay to stop there regardless of the two extra laps you have to make?
It can be quite a struggle when we want to prove we can do it all, balance family, run our schedules, and find success. We desperately try to hide any sign of weakness because that would show others that we are failing. God isn’t limited by our human standards. His grace is more than enough and no temptation has overtaken or enticed you that is not common to human experience (nor is any temptation unusual or beyond human resistance)…he will not allow you to be tempted beyond your ability but along with the temptation, he will provide a way out as well…” 1Corinthians 10:13.
What are you struggling with?
I once struggled with anger, thoughts of self-harm, depression, and eating was even a problem. I would look calm because I tried so hard not to show the struggle I was going through. Every time someone commented on how bold or confident I was and even went ahead to set me as an ideal character, I would smile thinking “if only you knew”. Everything triggered me. I chose to rather hurt myself than let anyone see that I was weak in any way. Conceal, don’t feel; the lies I told myself back then. Because how can you ask yourself not to feel when you already feel it so deeply that it consumes you? Later on, I found out that it is best to deal with the demons, not conceal them. Those demons thrive in the darkness so don’t hide them, bring them to the light they hate so much.
2 Corinthians 12: 9 But he said to me, “ my grace is made sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness”. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.
I pulled them to the light and watched them burn. I spoke to the right people, listened and read from those who overcame what I was struggling with, and held God close like never before. I went out of my way to find help, I did not wait for it to find me. My big brother always said there’s no time to sit and feel sorry for yourself, today, I understand his words to mean that growth is intentional. I pursued stability, peace, calm and the freedom of the falcon I’ve always admired. The truth is, no matter how unloved you feel, at least one person cares about your existence. You’re just too blinded by the negative feelings to notice it. I recall how I would burst into tears randomly and end up laughing then laugh harder when I realise how crazy I probably look. You know those people in your circle that you just can’t phantom what they are so bubbly and bright about? I lean towards that side now. I still have my silent days, like every omnivert does, controlled ones not the ones that consume. Now I throw everything into the light where it has no hold on me.
A voltage stabilizer provides a constant voltage to a load even during voltage fluctuations to avoid damage. No one wishes for a shock but you still get the voltage stabilizer “just incase”. If you do not have something you are struggling with then note, 1 Corinthians 10:12, therefore let the one who thinks he stands firm (immune to temptation) take heed lest he falls.
You should have your stabilizers in place at all times.
I count myself privileged to have people who speak the truth around me (and I do my best to hear them out), remind myself to pause as many times as possible (no one is keeping count) and of course, I keep God very close (he is my best bet).
Thank you for reading down to this point! Do you have stabilizers? What or who keeps you accountable? Don’t forget to leave a comment and share this with those you think would find answers or questions in it. See you soon!💕